"The Countess of the Spitball"

Oh my god some people are so mean. I am very technologically useful so I was just walking inside a mall blogging from my cell phone. All of a sudden a lady walked into a sporting goods store, picked up a baseball, spit on it and threw it at my face. It hit me right in the orbital bones. When I got done crying I told her it was very painful and asked why she did it. She said because she is the "Countess of the spitball." I went home very sad.