Who Am I?

I am Morty Ortman, the once-famous major league pitcher and now renowned sports writer. I am making my rounds across the internet, trying to get people to read my sports blog, which I believe you may find funny, amusing and down-right hamster-like. It's perfect for the lonely sports fan like you who's bored this time of year. Remember, you can call me Morty because I always respond to those who call me by name. I am also a VERY big fan of the orchestra and danced my life away on a gay cruise last month. Please follow me at twitter.com/mortyortman Thank you.