March Madness is a JOKE!

If you are really the sports fan I think you are, you probably already know "March Madness" is the single biggest joke in sports history. I'd rather watch paint dry than watch a bunch of washed up college students try to play basketball with their stupid high tops on in March and April!

The problem with "March Madness" is it makes the regular college basketball season irrelevant. What happens when the L.A. Lakers go 41-0 in the regular season, get to the field of 64, then lose in the 1st round? It's not fair. They were obviously the best team all year, and now they're toast. I don't like it.

Now consider this from the opposite perspective. Let's say you like horseradish or relish or something. Let's also say the Georgetown Boilermakers go 11-17 in the regular season, but somehow squeeze their ugly raisins into the field of 64 simply because they get hot at the right time of year and win their conference tournament so they automatically get invited to "The Big Dance." And then let's say they win the whole damn thing! Does that mean they're the best college hoops team that year? Of course not! It only means they played well for a short period of time during March, yet they get to call themselves National Champions that season.

You can't be serious.

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How to Throw a Knuckleball

This post isn't about Texas basketball legend Major Applewhite. It's not about pro golfer Carmelo "Anthony" Woods. It's not about elder statesman Dave Corzine. It's not about the roof collapsing in Minnesota. It's not about any of that. It's about how to throw a knuckle ball.

For the uninitiated, a knuckle ball -- or "knuckler," as those of us in the sports world call it -- is a dirty little pitch only a handful of special players know how to throw. Dusty Baker was one of the best knuckle ball pitchers ever to grace the pigiron.

I know what you're thinking. You probably want to hire me on a private consulting basis so I can teach you first-hand how to throw a knuckler. Sorry Charlie, my schedule's full.

Don't worry though. I'm not gonna tease you with all this valuable info and leave you hanging. Instead, here's a wonderfully instructional video on how to throw a knuckleball. If you have questions after the video let me know.

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Spring Training Starts Soon Even Though You Didn't Know It

Since you are not knowledgeable about baseball, you probably had no idea Spring Training starts in a week or so. Pitchers and catchers are required to report first, then a little bit later the rest of the team joins the pitchers and catchers.

Spring Training usually takes place in San Diego or Capetown. I'm not sure where they're having it this year but as soon as I find out (which shouldn't take too long because I've got some pretty good sources), I'll let you know.

Anyway the reason why pitchers and catchers report first is because they always get sick and tired of being with their families during the off season. So they head to the ballpark for Spring Training even though its technically still wintertime.

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The Super Bowl SUCKED!

Well if you're like me -- and if you hate broccoli and tuna, you're EXACTLY like me -- you were expecting a big, exciting Super Bowl game between the Packers and Steelers yesterday. But what did we get instead? Tushy!

There were so many green and black and yellow buttocks flying around the field I couldn't even enjoy the game. The question is, should we file a formal complaint with the NFL?

I mean come on, we tuned in to watch a football game, and instead of the anticipated slug fest, all we get are buttocks. I'm pissed!

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